Top 9 Clues that you MAY have followed the wrong tweeter

I am sure you think carefully before you follow someone new on twitter. You look at the #FF list of someone you trust; or take a look at someone wise enough to RT one of your great tweets or blog posts. Yet occasionally you get a quick signal from a tweet or DM of the newly followed that you may have erred…

I have collected my top nine quick indications that I screwed up below.

Number one of course is the DM we all hate:

Hey, I just added you to my Mafia family. You should accept my invitation! Click here: http://t.co/thedon

What can I say? I would like to urge him to go back to Facebook and help tie up the world’s internet during the afternoon playing Farmville, but a quick unfollow is best.

The remaining indicators are in reverse order, ala David Letterman:

9. Make some money tweeting, sign up to for Sponsored Tweets! http://bit.ly/spamu

Bet I’m going to really enjoy reading your tweets! Let’s sing the SPAM song…

8. BBW lovers join me on my webcam. I can travel to help you relax on business trips. http://warmup.com

Even if the #FF list is from a trusted twitter friend you should still check out the profiles before following. You don’t know everything about your twitter friend or what he does away from home…

7.  Home Teeth Whitening – What is the Best Teeth Whitener?: http://bit.ly/whiteisright

Everyone on twitter should have gleaming teeth by now!

6. Get followers fast! Today’s giveaway: 5,000 followers!

I bet that they are a fascinating group of tweeters! In The Tao of Twitter, Mark Schaefer discusses advising a friend to close a twitter account after he had “enhanced” it with one of these services.

5. Gothic, vampire or punk friends in your area? Our site 100% free http://bit.ly/biteme

Well she was all dressed in black in her profile picture…

4. NewlyFollowed11 uses TrueTwit validation service. To validate click here: http://truetwit.com/pzzl

Even though the leading influence measuring firm claims that there are good bots and bad bots, I empathize with the urge to connect with real people. However, take the time some day to actually play the truetwit letter game. After you decipher the code their pitch to join is NOT primarily to avoid BOTs, but instead to avoid their own service!

Truetwit is a service similar to the window-washing service that used to be offered at the tunnels exiting Manhattan: A guy would throw mud on your windshield and then would offer to clean it off for a couple bucks.

TrueTwit offers to throw no more mud on your windshield if you direct them to some of your new friends. Some friend!

3. The ***** Network is about to change the face of network marketing http://bit.ly/sucker

The internet is full of questionable quasi-pyramid schemes. Our’s has a celebrity brand name! What celebrity would be suitable? Maybe a modern-day Pat Paulsen? Or a businessman who has taken more money from banks through serial bankruptcies than Willie Sutton could have ever dreamed about?

Finally #2! The tweet that ranks only behind “join my Mafia family”:

@wisetweeter1 , @wisetweeter2 , @wisetweeter3 and 7 others unfollowed me today … checked by http://whnrs.com

Ten people took the effort to unfollow you today? Must have had good reason… Is it because of the whining? Some of your other recent tweets:

  • Only one person RTed me last week!
  • My mother doesn’t really love me.
  • @realJonasBrothers and @JustinBieber have not followed me back!

Nine is an odd number for a list like this: 10 or 12 is better. Do you have a suggestion of one or two I missed? Please comment!

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7 Responses to Top 9 Clues that you MAY have followed the wrong tweeter

  1. Clare eikson says:

    Lol… I think we have all come across some of these, but your post made me laugh, especially the thought of using twitter to expand your mafia family…

  2. Jon baker says:

    Great post, I’m not in the mafia either.

    The one I hate is getting that DM straight back after following that says “Hi, this is an autotweet. Please look at my website”. If I wanted to I would have already done so before following you. If you want me to do so later, show me some good tweets.

  3. I like the ones that follow me and then ask “Are u fun?” Webcam models have run amuck on twitter

  4. Just as an exercise in weirdness, I’d say your #11 should be, “Has followed MatchesMalone.”

  5. Thanks for this post. I have an acute allergic reaction to seeing that I have received a DM. Unless it is from someone I actually know, I unfollow that person as fast as possible.

  6. gschirr says:

    Thanks Alice! I am glad you didn’t apply your rule to me…

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